I Don't Belong To Anyone
by Hayley'sSecretLove
Summary: R5 story NOT GLEE. My interpretation of what would happen if Riker 'was' gay, Rydellington, Raura and obviously Rikurt. Maybe even some CrissColfer, just because. Having gone through the awkward process of coming out myself this should be written well... Right?
1. Chapter 1

**R5 story. My interpretation of what would happen if Riker 'was' gay, Rydellington, Raura and obviously Rikurt. Maybe even some CrissColfer, just because. Having gone through the awkward process of coming out myself this should be written well... Right?**

"Dinner's ready!" Stormie shouted from the kitchen laying various bowls of food onto the kitchen table; It was more of a counter but everyone ate at it anyway.

Soon all five of her children plus a Ratliff were sat at the table with silverware in their hands. It was nice to be home for once instead of constantly being on the road.

"This is really good" Ryland said his mouth full of potato. "What's in this?"

"Chef's secret" Stormie smiled having a spoonful herself. "But if you really want to know then help me do the dishes"

"I'll pass thanks" Ryland replied. Stormie went to take another bite from her meal when her eyes fell upon her eldest son. He was sat with one hand resting on his cheek and the other stabbing his food with a fork.

"You okay honey?" She asked. Riker's eyes flickered upwards to her's. He nodded slowly. "You sure? You haven't touched your meal"

"I'm not hungry" Riker said looking down at his plate. Stormie gave her husband a concerned look with a 'talk to him' implied. Mark nodded.

Around ten minutes later everyone had finished eating, well everyone except Riker.

"Hey Riker can I have your leftovers?" Ryland asked, he really loved his mom's cooking.

"Sure" Riker said pushing his plate towards his youngest brother.

"Thanks"

Riker smiled weakly, it was clearly forced. There was defiantly something wrong. "Everyone may be excused" Stormie announced leaving Ryland to finish his meal alone.

Rocky, Ellington and Ross all went into the main room to play GTA V (Best game ever besides Heavy Rain) as Rydel picked up her 3DS to pick up on Pokémon Y. (Another great game)

"Hey, Can I talk to you?" Mark asked just as Riker was about to leave the table. He nodded not moving. "In private"

* * *

Mark and Riker were now sat in the main bedroom on the end of the bed. "What's bothering you?"

"Nothing, I'm fine" Riker replied fiddling with the hem of his shirt. Mark put a hand on his son's knee.

"You're not fine. No matter what's bothering you I won't judge you. I just want you to be honest with me"

"I know you won't judge me. It's just so hard to say. I can't even admit it to myself yet" Riker mumbled shrugging the hand of his leg.

"Do you want to write it down?" Mark suggested, he was generally worried now.

"I can't" Riker said close to tears. He would much rather have this conversation with mom, His dad wouldn't understand.

"Is this about a girl?" Mark asked earning a huff of amusement from Riker.

"No"

"Your siblings?" Mark persisted. He knew if he kept asking he would eventually gain the answer and know how to help his son.

"No. And stop asking questions because you will get the answer eventually" Riker sniffled lightly.

"That was the plan" Mark forced a laugh and then it hit him. No. This couldn't be? He raised his son better than that.

"Riker, Are you taking drugs?"

"What? No! Why would I do that?"

"Phew, I worried for a second then" Mark sighed in relief placing his hand back on Riker's knee despite his protests.

"Can I leave now?"

"No, You're not leaving until I figure out what's bothering you and how to help" Mark said tightening his grip. "Does this have anything to do with touring, money, fame or the band?"

"No"

"Okay. How about where you life is headed. The future? Are you scared?" Mark asked looking into a pair of brown eyes, glazed over with salty tears.

"Kind of, But the problem causes that. Not that the future is the problem. Wait, Why are you asking me questions again?"

"I told you. We need to figure this out. So please let me continue, all you have to answer is yes or no"

"Okay" Riker nodded still scared out of his right mind. If his dad did find out how would he react?"

* * *

"What's going on in there?" Rocky asked trying to press his ear closer towards the door. Ross pushed him out of the way slightly.

"Something about figuring stuff out. I hope Riker's okay" Ross replied removing his ear from the door frame.

"Maybe we shouldn't be listening in, We'll find out eventually. I feel bad" Ryland, who had finally finished eating, said.

The three boys left to join Ellington and Rydel on the couch. "Did you learn anything?" Ratliff asked his eyes fixed on the screen.

"Not really, he didn't admit to anything" Ross said literally throwing himself at the couch. Rydel peered up over her DS, Were they talking about Riker?

"Guys, It's rude to eavesdrop. It's none of your business okay!" Rydel said angrily. All four heads turned to her at once.

"What do you know?"

"I don't know anything! I'm just saying that if I had a secret I wouldn't want my brothers trying to find out what it was"

"I know but he's really distant. It must really be bothering him"

"It is" Rydel whispered.

**See you next time. I update this story every Wednesday and Sunday! Have a 'Courage' as a gift for reading this xxx**


	2. Chapter 2

**Ready for part two!?**

"Dad, I'd rather talk about this tomorrow. I just need to figure this mess out myself"

"Are you sure Riker?" Riker nodded. Mark patted his knee. "Then you may go"

Riker managed a weak smile before walking to the door and turning the handle. "Oh Riker!" He stopped opening the door. "If you need anything, I'm always here for you okay?"

"Sure. Thanks Dad"

* * *

Riker made his way into the main room where all his siblings seemed to be. They were noisily playing GTA V. Sweet! This is the perfect way to keep his mind off of it. But as soon as his family became aware of his presence the atmosphere changed. Everyone was silent with blank expressions on their faces.

Ignoring them Riker sat down next to Rydel. He crossed his arms and leant back onto the pillows as he watched the figures dart around the screen occasionally shooting someone. '_For god sakes just play, they are your younger brothers! You're so fucking weak_' Riker's mind screamed at him.

"Hey Delly, Dad sad something about you and me helping clean the shed. Do you wanna' do and do it now?" Riker said, praying to whatever or whoever was listening that she would say yes.

"Sure!" Rydel replied as eager to leave as Riker. They fled through the kitchen and out to the garden leaving four very confused boys.

"She knows something"

* * *

"Did Dad find out?" Rydel asked worriedly. Riker shut the shed's door shaking his head before falling into his sister's arms. He couldn't hold it in, not anymore. "Hey it's okay" Rydel whispered into her brother's hair lightly stroking him on the back as he emptied his tear ducts.

"It's not. Everyone's already treating me differently and they don't even know yet" Riker managed between sobs, "And if that isn't enough, I just so happen to be in love with a wonderful guy with a great personality and high respect for me"

"That isn't a bad thing" Rydel laughed. Riker huffed in disapproval.

"Yeah and he's married. To the fucking queen of perfection" Rydel pulled away, it all made sense now.

"Riker... I had no idea. I'm so-"

She was interrupted by another flood of tears trailing down her back as Riker gripped her frame tightly again. "I had no idea that- I mean. Curt?" He cried even louder.

"And I can't even say it yet" He mumbled into her shoulder.

"Say what?"

"That I'm gay. That I'm a fucking homosexual and my life is over in every way possible!" Riker yelled not even caring if anyone else heard him anymore.

Rydel was speechless. She didn't know what to say. What do do. How could she help. Nothing came to her mind. But the silence was getting to her. Her brother needed her and she was going to do everything in her power to help. Even if it meant destroying a marriage.

**Wow that's short. I couldn't wait til' Wednesday! I honestly just couldn't sleep so I wrote a shitload of stories today. Your prize for reading is a rocket ship for totally awesome business. And... I'm seeing All Time Low in March ASDFGHJKL I CAN'T EVEN PAINT ROSES FOR YOU! Wow, I need counselling, oh wait...**


	3. Chapter 3

**What what what what what. Wow I sound like Macklemore. Anyway here is chapter 3 on Tuesday/Wednesday as promised. Wow three updates in one week. I AM GOD! P.s. Watch R5's new cover of Counting Stars 9 billion out of 10!**

"Do you want to sleep in my room tonight?" Rydel asked as she and her brother walked around the garden aimlessly. "We can have a Harry Potter marathon"

"Okay I'm in!" Riker laughed smiling at his sister, she could always make him feel better. It was nice to know he had someone. "But everyone's already really suspicious about me now, me sleeping in your room is just more evidence that something's wrong"

"Here's the thing, They aren't gonna' be suspious"

"Why not?"

"You're going to tell them"

"What!?" Riker shouted no longer walking. Rydel stopped shortly after and turned around to face him. "I can't. I'm not ready"

"Riker, You will never feel ready. You need to tell your family, I can tell it's upsetting you. If you just get it over with then you can live the way you want, not having to hide who you are around the people who love the most. We all love Riker and you liking guys isn't going to change anything"

"Wow, That was a long speech" Riker laughed. He always laughed when he was nervous. Rydel hugged him. She knew he needed it.

"So will you? I'll hold your hand the whole time"

"I'm not five" Riker replied pulling away and wiping away a tear that was threatening to fall. "I can do it. If you're sure it's the right thing to do" Rydel nodded taking her brother's hand.

"You act five sometimes" The earned her a light shove.

* * *

This was it. Riker stood before his brothers and parents plus a Ratliff with Rydel sat closely near him. This heart pounded heavily in his chest and he was pretty sure he was sweating. Too many people. Too much judgement, too many bad possibilities. Man up Riker! Just go for it what's the worst that could happen? No! Don't answer that.

"Um, Well you guys know that I've been acting a little _different _lately but that's because I've been trying to figure myself out." Riker took a deep breath. This was it. "Why I like guys"

Rydel stood up at this point and despite his earlier protests took Riker's hand. She couldn't tell if anyone was going to go all batshit crazy on his ass or not. Everyone just seemed really suprised, shocked. Rydel could feel her brother shaking, no one was saying anything.

"I- I'm gay. I still love you all more than anything and I hope that you still love me even though I'm not _normal_.

"How dare you say you're not normal" Mark said standing to pull his son into a hug soon to be joined by Ryland and Ross.

"I always knew it. They way you looked at Alex Gaskarth"

"Shut up Rocky" Riker laughed before hugging him also, Then Ellington who was honoured to find out at the same time as his brothers. It meant a lot to him that Riker trusted him enough.

Everyone moved away from Riker all eyes suddenly falling on Stormie sat on a chair in the middle of the room. She slowly arose and walked forwards to her first born.

"You are beautiful and talented and I am so proud of you" She cried wrapping her arms around him. Everyone huddled in a kind of bundle into Stormie finally let go, making everyone else do so.

"Finally I can breathe again" Riker said inhaling sharply. Everyone laughed. Rydel was right, she's always right. But obviously she can never know that.

"Who's wants to go to Get Shaved?" Stormie shouted. Loud cheers filled the room.

* * *

"Does anyone else know?" Ross asked when the had all got got inside the mimi-van. Riker shook his head.

"I don't want to tell anyone else yet. I need at least a month before I tell the R5 Family. Cause' then everybody knows and I'm booked for Ellen"

"You love Ellen" Rydel laughed.

"He's gay Rydel" Rocky said rolling his eyes making Riker laugh. Nothing had gone wrong so far. But it's the future you've got to be scared of.

Hey Ya'll. Delly speaks the truth. If you are nervous about coming out then message me. Only my parents and you lot know. I'm not ready for everyone to know yet but it's important that you have some people you can go too. I'm here. Always. Just like the amazing R5 song that I pretend Riker wrote about Curt. *le sigh* Stay strong xxx


	4. Chapter 4

**Sorry I didn't update I totally forgot! I'm such an idiot! Anyway here is chapter four. Finally some Rikurt. OH YEAH!**

The minivan pulled into the parking lot and all eight people clambered out. As they walked into the store the 'chef' smiled at them, the Lynch's were here very often. Stormie went straight to the counter to order everyone favorites while her kids and husband searched for the best seat. They automatically headed for the seat by the huge window that looked over the city at night, an array of Christmas lights hung from the houses and lit up the world outside. It was beautiful. But someone else had already chosen that seat.

Riker's smile fell from his face and he panicked wanting to leave immediately. There was Curt with his wife Kim. Enjoying their frozen yogurt with an occasional suggestive look. Mark grinned. _Please no dad!_

"Hey guys!" He waved walking right up to the couple. "Do you mind if we sit with you?"

_No no no no, Please say you mind, please. Fuck my life_. Riker was so tempted to fake a heart attack or something because he could not do this.

"Sure" Curt smiled shuffling closer to the window and looking at Riker expectantly. _He wants me to sit next to him. No why?_

Faking his terror Riker walked over to his best friend smiling and sat next to him sure to give Rydel a worried look when no one was watching. Curt gave his friend a sideways hug obvious to what he was doing to him.

"So how are you guys?" He asked the Lynch's. Ross shrugged.

"Okay I guess, Things have been a little different recently though" Riker looked up and Ross and glared. No one else was going to know, especially Curt.

"Is everything okay?" Kim asked with concern. _Fuck her! _

"Riker just had to tell u-"

"Shut up Ross!" Riker mouthed kicking his brother under the table.

"Ow! He just kicked me!" Ross complained waiting for Mark to do something. Curt frowned, he was acting differently.

"Here is everyone's frozen yo- oh Hi Curt! Kim" she said placing herself down next to her husband before handing out the different orders.

* * *

When Ross started talking about Teen Beach movie Curt took an opportunity to talk to Riker. "You okay?" He whispered.

"Yeah, just stressed"

"About?"

"I can't-"

"Do you need something, Are you in pain?"

"No"

"What's going on?"

"Nothing"

" I just want to help you"

"I'm fine okay, just drop it"

"No"

"What"

"I care about you okay. Please let me help you, what's wrong"

"I need the bathroom" Riker said loudly standing up to ran into the toilets. Rydel stood and ran after him. She knew where he would be.

Sure enough he was leaning against the car with his head in his hands. "Riker" Rydel said quietly walking towards her brother.

"Go away" he whimpered not moving an inch. Rydel sighed walking even closer.

"I'm sorry. I really am but I don't think there's anything we can do" He just cried harder.

"I want to tell him but then he'll find out"

"Find out what?"

"That I fucking love him. What did you think?" Rydel wrapped her arms around him again.

"He wont. You'll feel better if you tell him. I was right last time wasn't I?"

Riker nodded and snuggled into her shoulder waiting for the tears to stop flowing.

By the time they had walked back into the room everyone's eyes were drawn to the puffy red ones of Riker's. it was obvious he was crying and the small wet patch on Rydel's shirt showed that he was obviously crying on her shoulder. Curt seemed to put these together first, Sherlock has it's benefits.

Rydel nodded at Riker. He could do this. She knew he could.

"I-" Riker stammered feeling tears try and escape his eyes again. "I like guys. I'm- gay" He looked down at his melting yogurt not daring to look anyone in the eye. To his surprise he felt a pair so arms wrap around his waist. Curt was hugging him, thank fucking god. He relaxed into the embrace as Curt tightened his grip. Rydel grinned, it felt great to help others, especially someone who was always there for her.

"We still love you just the same" Kim said smiling trying to break her husband away from the American dream with kindness. _Geez why did Riker have to be so damn close to her husband. He is a threat, their relationship is hanging by a thread anyway. Married for three years and never even engaged in heavy petting. I bet he would fuck Riker. Argh why does my brain do this? He's my straight handsome soulmate._

To Kim's relief they broke apart soon after. "Thanks, you two are a few of the first to know"

"Like Kim said we love you just the same"

**So that's it for this week. See ya next Wednesday. It's funny how Riker and Kim both hate each other but are obvious of the other ones hate. I love that. Anywho I will see you soon xxx p.s. Listen to We Are The In Crowd's new song if you like puck rock music, it's totally awesome!**


	5. Chapter 5

**THE WALKING DEAD GAME SEASON TWO! AHHHHH! I having been waiting forever! *PARTAY* **

"We'll see you soon I guess" Ross waved as his family stood between the minivan and Curt's car. Kim smiled and waved before getting into the car. Riker faked a smile in her direction.

"Sure. We need to go out sometime" Curt said giving Riker a hug. "Like to the cinema or sometime"

"I'd love that" Riker replied grinning as he pulled away. Rocky raised his eyebrow. They were so in love and oblivious to it, like all the Niff fanfictions that he found bookmarked on Riker's laptop. Wait what?

"I see you Tuesday 7:00, I heard they're showing Catching Fire" Curt smiled before joining his wife in his car and driving away.

"It's a date"

"Shut up Rocky!"

* * *

Rydel smiled all the way home. Curt had practically asked her brother out, even Rocky spotted it! This may be easier then she thought.

Riker was smiling too. He practically had a date with Curt on Tuesday! But who was he kidding, he's married and brushing hands when reaching for popcorn is all a movie fantasy. But at least he was still Curt's best friend. This sucked, it was just like all the Niff fanfictions.

Ross was busy drawing hearts and various cartoon planes on the window condensation. It was literally the funnest thing ever and he was proud of his choice to sit by the window.

Rocky was wondered why the hell his brother had bookmarked stories like 'Loving You', 'Niff Unconditionally' and the pornographic 'You Are The One'. Jeez his brother was a perv, or maybe he liked Curt! It's all made sense now!

Ryland was making a christmas countdown tally on his hand with a marker he found on his car seat.

Ellington was leant against the window Ross wasn't violating and watched the world flicker by sneaking the occasional glance at Rydel. Her smile was breathtaking, He died a little inside when he made her laugh or was the cause of her happiness but she was probably just happy about Riker being 'out' now.

Stormie was mouthing along to 'It's Gonna Be Me' on the radio and watching at the clock. Her kids had an interview tomorrow, they needed a good night's sleep.

Meanwhile Mark was driving and contemplating whether his son was a top or a bottom.

**Woah, it's kinda short. Sorry! This story will be updated on Monday next week because Wednesday is Christmas and I'm working on a 'Niffmas' Fic that will be up on the 25th. Xxx**


	6. Chapter 6

**Time for chapter two, I didn't have wifi so sorry if this is up late. I have been playing the walking dead and Glee Scene It \o/ . I love you guys anyway xxx**

The Lynch's (and Ratliff) were currently on the way to their last interview with CleverTv this year. It had been a wild and fun ride to spend time with the two nice girls who seemed to have a fascination with their lives, in the best way possible.

Riker was slightly worried that they would ask about relationships and one of his idiotic brothers would spill the secret. But he could handle it

* * *

It went better than Riker thought but when Ross kept going on about how you can't not love girls it felt like a bullying jab in the stomach. He knew that Ross was just trying to make a joke but still it hurt.

"What are you gonna' wear?" Rydel asked her brother who was sat on the end of her bed browsing tumblr.

"What?" He replied still focusing all his attention on his iPad. Rydel rolled her eyes and sat next to him.

"What are you wearing tonight? You know, for your date" Riker went red.

"It's not a date" Rydel chuckled.

"Keep telling yourself that. Oh, We have to write a song for AwesomenessTV today so do you mind if we write it without you cause-"

"I already wrote one" Riker said finally looking at Rydel "I'd love it if we could sing it for them"

Rydel smiled, "Can you sing it for me? Then I can record it and leave Rocky to work out the instrumental"

Riker nodded turning off his iPad and changing his position on the bed. "It's called 'Wishlist' "

"You make my heart beat faster than you know,

When you meet me underneath the mistletoe,

Cause' all I want for Christmas is a kiss, just a kiss one kiss from you

All dressed up sweet as a candy cane,

My angel brighter than the one on top of the tree,

Ohh ee so sweet

And ohh every single move,

my eyes on you,

Making it harder to see,

But if I don't close my eyes than Santa can't bring to me

Oooo and all the presents under the tree they don't compare to you and me,

And outside the snow is falling, inside the temperature's rising

You make my heart beat faster than you know,

When you meet me underneath the mistletoe,

Cause' all I want for Christmas is a kiss, just a kiss one kiss from you

St. Nick, Mr Santa Claus,

You know my wishlist really isn't long,

All I want for Christmas is a kiss, just a kiss, one kiss from you

Woahh oh oh oh

Cuddled up right by the fire, think I hear those jingle bells ringing right down the street

Oh ee so sweet

We're cuddled up you and me,

All the presents under the tree they don't compare to you and me,

Sweet dreams can wait til' morning cause' tonight Santa is coming

You make my heart beat faster than you know,

When you meet me underneath the mistletoe,

Cause' all I want for Christmas is a kiss, just a kiss one kiss from you

St. Nick, Mr Santa Claus,

You know my wishlist really isn't long,

All I want for Christmas is a kiss, just a kiss, one kiss from you

And all the presents under the tree they don't compare to you and me,

Sweet dreams can wait til' morning cause' tonight Santa is coming

You make my heart beat faster than you know,

When you meet me underneath the mistletoe,

Cause' all I want for Christmas is a kiss, just a kiss one kiss from you

St. Nick, Mr Santa Claus,

You know my wishlist really isn't long,

All I want for Christmas is a kiss, just a kiss, one kiss from you"

Rydel stopped recording and out her phone back in her pocket. "That was about Curt wasn't it"

Riker was about to disagree before remembering who he was trying to fool. "Yeah"

"That's adorable! And the song is amazing. I'll show Rocky" Rydel said hugging her brother before leaving the room.

**Yes, I know it's short but I was feeling a little writer-blocking on this story. Expect the next chapter on Wednesday as normal. And I'm sorry if that chapter will be a little excitably written because it's new year's aka SHERLOCK SEASON THREE! **


	7. Chapter 7

**Sorry it's been a while but SHERLOCK! I am so sorry but I just returned to school and I have a lot of coursework. I'm choosing my GCSE's now. :/ Anyway here is more Rikurt for you all. I love you all xxx**

Riker was sure his chest would explode and his heart would fall onto the cold ground before him. He had never been out with a guy before. Well it wasn't technically a date but he knew that he liked Curt a lot and he could make the most of pretending that they would be in a relationship. It was the closest he would ever get.

He took a deep breath and drew himself towards the cinema doors. Cinema doors were awesome. He would of done several laps in them if he wasn't so nervous.

"Hey!" Curt said walking slowly over to the blond who had just awkwardly shuffled into the building.

"Hey" Riker replied looking at the ground. Trying so hard to hide his blush. Curt still noticed.

"You okay? If you feel ill then we don't have to"

"No, It's just hot in here" Riker said daring to look into his friends eyes trying not to fall into them.

"Okay. The movie starts in five. You wanna' go in now?" Curt asked. Riker shrugged mentally slapping himself for how stupid he was acting.

* * *

Meanwhile a certain woman who went by the name of Kimberly Whalen was at home watching glee. Trying to take her mind of the fear she was feeling inside. It only made things worse. Everything sideways glance they had, everything single stupid smile. They way they looked at each other, always next to each other.

_Kimberly you are stupid. He loves you not a guy! Stop thinking that! He's just frigid or cares deeply about his friends or he was just in character around his warbler friends. You're fine. Just have more ice - cream and relax. You have the house to yourself, do whatever you like. _

* * *

It was around halfway through the movie that Riker decided to make even more a fool of himself by forcefully shoving his hand into the packet of Redvines just as Curt I'd desperate to create any physical contact but of course the fucking cakes split open at the intensity of his sudden movement. Curt laughed softly collecting teh fallen RedVines of his lap and returning them to the know decapatated packing. Riker blushed heavily and was thankful for the absence of the lighting.

* * *

Kim couldn't relax she was busy watching every glee episode with her husband in. Analysing every moment. Her suspicions got the best of her, she was terrified, shaking as she replayed every scene in her mind over and over and over.

* * *

"That movie was amazing!" Curt exclaimed as they left the cinema for Starbucks. Riker nodded.

"Totally awesome! I can't wait for The Fault In Our Stars movie though" Curt nodded just like Riker had.

"I loved the books greatly, the movie will be so sick"

* * *

Kim had moved onto livestreams, youtube videos, anything. She needed evidence. Evidence that her husband loved her and not him.

* * *

"You're amazing" Curt smiled after Riker had just told him the story of how his siblings tipped water on him in the shower.

"You really think so?" Riker asked blushing profusely and looking down at his gingerbread latte.

"Yeah. You're so full of joy and happiness. And you really care about you're siblings even though they can be little shits"

Riker laughed gently. "Why did you want to go out with me?"

"I want to show you that nothing has changed. You are still loved. It's not who you are it's what you say and do in your life. You inspire so many and return hope to people who thought their passion had died years ago. The fact that you are gay is nothing. If anything it's better, it shows people how strong you are to be able to deal with all the resentment, all the hate. You are the perfect role model for this generation and I am not letting you leave my life"

"Do you think I should start telling people?"

"Only when you're ready" Curt said reaching out his hand and placing in on his knee. Riker smiled, it reminded him of his dad but it felt more comforting. Riker knew he could do it. Just one simple tweet and all this stress would be gone.

* * *

Kim's phone buzzed just as she was about to quit obsessing and eat. Riker had tweeted, daring to look she unlocked her phone.

'I hope this doesn't put coal in anyone's sockings but I'm gay' followed by,

'This isn't a joke. I love you guys xxx'

Kim threw her phone at the wall. What did Curt do that made him confess?

* * *

Riker put his phone done on the table beside the couch he and Curt where sat on and twiddled his thumbs breathing heavily.

"You okay?" Riker nodded as his phone screen lit up with notifications.

"I don't want to look" He said his voice breaking halfway through. Curt reached over and picked up his friend's phone.

"You should. I'm here" Curt replied his hand moving from knee to thigh.

Riker hesitatingly took the phone from his hands and opened it.

'Really? Damn! I totally wanted u! Oh well! Love you just the same xxx'

'Congrats! Thx for telling us! U are loved!'

'You're joking! Fck! I thought we were soulmates! Whatever. Still love u xx'

'So is Curt gonna come out next and admit your undying love for each other?'

Riker stopped reading aloud at that one and went red as Curt did also.

"Your fans are really supportive" Riker shook his head.

"No, They're family"


	8. Chapter 8

**Wow. Long time no see. I've been busy with GCSE stuff, It is serious, my future depends on what I chose to do so I have to think about it. But It's all over now. So except more chapters only they will be updated every Friday/Saturday because during the week I need to focus on school work. This chapter is a lot longer than the others and I'm still not sure if I like it but here it is anyway xxx**

"Chris just texted me" Riker said as he and Curt sat in the older man's car. "He said that he is proud of me and happy that I am comfortable with myself unlike he was at first"

"That's sweet. I'm glad you got such a positive response from everyone" Curt replied keeping his eyes fixed on the road, today was not the day for an accident.

"Me too. We only lost around 20 fans. They were never family anyway" Riker mumbled leaning against the car window and watching the rain fall elegantly onto the road with such grace.

"Did Kim message you?" Curt asked, he was aware that his wife was a bit sketchy around the whole thing.

"No" Riker said confused as to why Curt would ask that. "But she did know before"

"True"

"Why do you ask?" Riker added. "Are you guys okay?"

Curt smiled slightly. Riker always cared so much, it was adorable and comforting at the same time.

"I thought we were but she didn't want me to go out with you today. She isn't homophobic, she's really close with her cousin. I just think she's worried you'd jump me or something. It's pathetic really. She really annoys me sometimes"

"Maybe you should tell her that. Not in a rude way or anything but just say that you don't like the way she treats you"

"No. I don't like the way she treats _you_"

Riker blushed heavily at this comment. It made he feel loved that Curt cared, but sadly he didn't care in that way.

"But it's not just that. I don't think I love her. I don't think I ever have"

Riker looked up suddenly. He felt so happy yet so pitiful at the same time. But mainly happy which made him hate himself even more. When Riker didn't reply Curt continued.

"I just- We can't seem to agree on anything. We never have. She was there and my parents thought she was sweet when I first met her so I asked her out. I knew after a while that dating her wasn't cutting it so I proposed in front of both our families. Our wedding was so painful, Just knowing that I would be spending the rest of my life with someone who I didn't particularly care for. She was there, she was my chance. The perfect escape to hide my- I just don't know how much longer I can pretend"

"Hide what?" Riker dared to ask as Curt turned the car into a pit stop because he knew he couldn't drive like this. He had just told Riker his entire life story. Why? Because he was there. That seems to be the answer to all his problems.

"I-" Curt parked the car and turned down the radio. Riker smiled at him in encouragement. "I um"

"You don't have to tell me if you don't want" Riker said even though he was dying to know what the problem was. He wanted to help his best friend.

"I've never told anyone before. _Ever_. You'll be the first to know, I trust you but please just don't tell anyone. _Please_" Curt shakily said trying to shake off the tears that were forming in his watering eyes.

"I promise"

"What you've done today is just so brave. Admitting who you really are to the world. I could never do that, I really meant it when I said you were the effect role model, I am so proud of you. I want you to know that"

"_Curt_" Riker said sternly. Curt was rambling.

"Kim is and always has been" Curt said slowly fiddling with his hands, "my beard"

"Wait. What do you mean Kim's your-"

"Beard" Curt said leaning back in his seat.

"So you're..." Riker stated starting to believe that this was all a dream.

Curt nodded and clasped the seatbelt tightly. As if he thought it was the only thing protecting himself.

"How long now?"

"Eleven years" Curt's voice broke. Riker's smile faded.

"Why didn't you tell anyone?"

"I didn't trust anyone. I knew my parents would act like it didn't matter but I know it would affect them. I trust you. You're my best friend and you're amazing" Curt said starting to generally shake in despair. Riker undid his seatbelt and leant across dthe car pulling Curt into a firm yet comforting hug. The gear stick and various other car controls were digging into his stomach but he didn't care. All that mattered right now was that Curt was okay.

"Thank you" Curt sniffled pulling away and wiping his eyes. Riker left a hand on his shoulder.

"I'm here for you okay. I may not of his it as long as you but I understand the pressure and this shitty unaccepting world we live in. Just be thankful we don't live in Russia"

Curt laughed at that which made Riker smile. "I'm defiantly thankful for that"

"What about Kim though? Do you know what you're going to do?"

"I need to tell her and my parents. Then the rest of the world. But doing it now isn't the best of ideas"

"Why not? The faster you get it done the better" Riker said "I know from experience"

"No it's that you just came out. If we both did on the same day then I think the shippers would get the wrong idea" Curt said. Riker blushed slightly.

"Yeah. We don't want them thinking were together" Riker said as the feeling of happiness slowly flowed away from his body and the sad emptiness seeped in and took it's place.

"No. That would make everything ten times worse" Curt said. "Do you really think I should start telling people though? What if I'm just frigid or even asexual? I've never even kissed a guy"

"Me neither" Riker replied, "But I think I know what I am"

"Exactly, you _think_ you know. Don't you want to be sure"

"More than anything" Riker sighed.

"Then let's find out now" Curt suggested undoing his seatbelt.

"What do you mean?" Riker asked his heat rate increasing rapidly. Curt moved slightly further forward and placed his hand lightly on Riker's shoulder before gently guiding it down to his waist. "Curt what are you-"

But Riker knew what he was doing, as soon as their lips touched.

Riker was suddenly overrun with emotions. He felt shocked as first but all that confused quickly melted into a feeling of safety and compassion. He kissed back. As their lips slowly caressed each other they seemed to be moving closer and closer together. Trying to be as close together as possible, get as much of each other as possible. Both of Curt's arms were know folded securely around Riker's waist and stroking his back lightly in sync with the pace of his lips. He slowly applied more pressure to the blond's mouth eliciting a small moan from his friend.

They continued for a few more minutes neither of them wanting it to end. Applying more and more pressure and opening their mouths slightly every time. Riker ran his tongue along Curt's bottom lip in permission which the other boy happily granted and before they knew it they were both full on making out with their tongue's exploring each other's mouths.

Yep, Curt was sure he was gay now. He didn't know if his feeling of love and care towards Riker was how he knew or the shift in his underwear. He slowly pulled away as Riker's lips followed his lips slightly.

"So, Do you know now?" Curt asked breathing heavily. Riker opened his eyes and crossed his legs awkwardly, he obviously had the same problem.

"Yeah. I'm defiantly gay. You?"

"Yeah. Thanks" Curt panted moving back into his car seat.

"No you started it. So thank y- HOLY SHIT!" Riker suddenly shouted. Curt jumped in surprise.

"What is it? Are you okay?"

"You're married Curt! And we just! I'm a home wrecker" Riker realised sinking his head into his hands. Curt leant forwards again and wrapped an arm around Riker's waist again.

"You're not. I'm the home wrecker, I started it and it's not like I ever consummated the marriage so.."

"You never had sex" Riker replied looking up at Curt. Curt blushed slightly which suprised Riker, he never blushed.

"Uh, yeah. I know, 25 and still a virgin"

"Well I'm 22 and I've never-"

"You've not married though" Curt sighed also sinking in his seat. "Wow, this evening been-"

"Totally awesome" Riker offered receiving a small chuckle in response.

"I really like you Riker. I really do. But I have to get a divorce first and the paperwork is-"

"Wait. You want to be with me in '_that_' way?" Riker asked mentally screaming in joy.

"Of course I do, So when this mess gets sorted out then I was thinking maybe we could- Only of you wanted to"

"I'd love to. It's just a shame we have to wait" Riker sighed.

"We don't have to" Curt said suddenly.

"I'm not letting you cheat on Kim"

"We aren't really married. If you don't have sex then it doesn't count, I read it online"

"But you'd still be in a relationship, I'm sorry, I really want to be with you but this is all happening so fast and I don't want to rush into anything and ruin your life"

"Trust me Rikes you have done everything but ruin my life" Curt laughed. "But if you don't want to then I can wait"

"No" Riker said, Damn his indecisiveness, "I can't. I can't wait. I need you"

"I can't believe we're doing this" Curt said trailing his hand down to met Riker's.

"You need to tell Kim first though. I'll come with you if you want. You don't even have to tell her why, Just tell her it isn't working" Riker said starting to ramble aswell.

"Okay. I can do it alone" Curt sighed leaning back even further against the car seat.

"You can stay at my house after you tell her" Riker offered squeezing his now 'secret undercover boyfriend's' hand.

"Thanks. you're amazing, I'm so sorry I didn't tell you sooner. I regret it so much"

"It's okay. We have each other now" Riker said "Wow, we've become the next glee episode"

Curt laughed. The cliche of it all was so dramatic and at the same time cheesy. Just like glee, only better scripted.


End file.
